HBO's Insecure was Popping - Being Insecure is Not: Time to Step Out
Y'all, it is literally past my bedtime and I should be sleeping but I just read an article by Regina Anaejionu and now I'm just here all motivated and excited and have my creative juices flowing as they say. And if that's not the time to write, then I don't know when is.
Moving On.
Time and time again God STAYS confirming to me that I'm a writer, and sometimes I read my own stuff from way back when and I'm like "girl you can write!!!" Lol. "Tooting my horn" in public like this is a huge deal if you know me. I don't. And it's not even that "fake humbleness" people talk about, it's a whole bag of insecurities and self-doubt that I'm unpacking day by day.
And that my friends is the journey I'm taking you along for. Me at the ripe ol' age of 40 stepping out of my own shadow and not stand in my own way. What this is going to look like, I don't have a clue. However, a sermon by TD Jakes that I listened to yesterday titled "Tomorrow belongs to God" reminded me that I don't need to know. I just need to be obedient and TRUST the one who holds my future.
Insecure or Not?
I'll leave y'all with this for now though...2 things I've learned being insecure is NOT:
It's not being shy
It's not being an introvert
These are personality trait labels I hid behind because I thought they sounded better and more socially acceptable than just not believing in yourself. But I know I'm not alone in having felt this way so as I stated above - I'm stepping out! Without any shame too, lol. Cause there's truly nothing to be ashamed about.
To clarify, being insecure doesn't mean you can't also be shy and an introvert, however, they're not synonymous, and not even always related.
Finding Belief.
We've all heard sayings like "feel the fear and do it anyway" and that advice might work for someone that's shy but I don't believe it works for someone insecure. It didn't work for me at least. The only thing that helped me was to find even as little as an ounce of belief in what I am doing. And I told myself, even if just one person reads, job done. But I also at the same time tell myself "ain't nobody gonna read this", lol. That way I can write freely without fear of being judged. This is also why I don't look at my stats. I refuse, lol. I don't want the numbers to change or affect my mood. It also doesn't necessarily reflect the value of my content. Could simply imply that I didn't share or market properly.
Anywho, I'm done rambling. Time to catch these Zzzz's, lol.
Stay tuned!!
Grace & Peace! ♥